the modern success paradox: why your 2025 goals need a different design
As January approaches, I've been thinking about how we architect success. We're about to be flooded with "new year, new you" messaging - promising transformation through harder work, bigger goals, and complete reinvention. But after years of working with leaders across industries, I've noticed something fascinating about how we experience success.
The Modern Paradox
Recently, I found myself holding my first published book. It was a moment I'd prepared for, even been reminded to savour because "the first time only happens once." Yet I struggled to process the achievement. Two months after publication, I realized I hadn't truly celebrated this milestone.
This isn't just my story. In my strategic advisory work, I see this pattern repeatedly - we've become so accustomed to achieving goals that we forget to acknowledge them. We're too busy looking at the next target.
Beyond Balance
Here's something I've learned: the concept of work-life balance is fundamentally flawed. Whether you work 40 hours or 60, work occupies your mental space 24/7 - especially when things aren't going well. What we need isn't balance - it's integration.
The Political Reality
As we ascend in our careers, something interesting happens. The challenge isn't necessarily the technical aspects of the role - it's the increased time spent navigating organizational politics and managing relationships. This invisible workload rarely features in success metrics, yet it often determines our effectiveness and wellbeing.
For women, particularly women of colour and Black women, this creates a compound effect. The higher you climb, the more you're expected to manage not just increased responsibility, but also the emotional labour of navigating systems that weren't designed with your success in mind.
Designing Different
Through my work, I've observed that successful integration requires intentional design:
Create Space for Processing
Acknowledge achievements before moving to the next goal
Understand how professional evolution shapes personal life
Recognize that each new level makes us learners again
Navigate the Invisible Work
Plan for the emotional labour of leadership
Build support systems for political navigation
Create boundaries that protect energy
Reframe Organizational Success
Challenge traditional metrics
Acknowledge the full scope of leadership work
Design systems that support integration
The Integration Blueprint
Success isn't about perfect separation between work and life - they're inherently interconnected. Think about it like designing a house: you need different rooms for different purposes, but they all need to flow together to create a functional home.
I'll share something from my own journey: one of my measures of success is creating "workations" that allow me to open doors to the world for my children. This isn't about balance - it's about intentional integration that serves both professional and personal goals.
Moving Forward
As you think about your 2025 goals, consider:
How will achievements at work impact your personal life?
What invisible work might come with your next career step?
Where do you need to create space for celebration?
How can you design success that serves your whole life?
The path to meaningful achievement isn't about working harder or finding perfect balance. It's about intentionally designing a life where professional and personal success enhance rather than compete with each other.
Ready to design success differently? Drop me a note at hello@leannemair.com to learn how you can being your journey.
